Hey everyone I'm currently in a really weird situation where I don't know what to do... Please help me out if you can!!! Story: A girl that I met 6 years ago whom we used to talked everyday and had a thing together. However something happened, and we stopped talking. She was "heartbroken". About a year ago, we found out that we work at the same company together and I had my official apology to her, she accepted it. Mean while, one of my friend from work started to like her at that time and I supported him. Couple months after they did end up together with long distance relationship. He came back to hang out with her here a couple times. Despite of how much they tried to communicate a lot in a long D relationship, things start to go down as he got busy. They end up breaking up because it is very hard for them when he is very busy and have no time for her. Now, I've been that guy that supported her since they broke up, we talk everyday, and I started feeling something, and she knows it too. Just last 3-4 weeks, we work together basically everyday, we hang out all the time, she'd even come over for food and slept over as well (no sex). IT might sound like we are at the stage where I can really ask her to be my girlfriend, but she also realizes that she doesn't want to focus on a relationship right now and she still finds herself holding on to my friend. WHAT SHOULD I DO? P.S. She's a cancer for quick personality reference lols
Dude shes sleeping over but you don't have the balls to do anything about it , obviously she wants you or im an idiot.. only you can tell what kinda relationship it is but it sounds like you guys want something more.
Ha, ha... You know when I read stuff like this, I just roll my eyes. If that were me, I would have been smoking a cigarette already while she was basking in the afterglow. Kids nowadays, you know what you want but you're afraid to reach out and take it. Hadouken is right. If you're not going to tap it, then move over buddy, someone else will, LOL...
Funny I just posted this on my friend's wall today... ure pretty much there but u just havent realized yet.... step up ur game... the friendzone is hard to get out of...
Go for it and prepare to lose the friendship. Everyone keeps saying they will stay friends but never do because it's too awkward..anyway Go hard or go home!
kudos to you man, expert level of self-control just talk to her about what she wants out of the "friendship". I mean, the woman lets you cuddle with her in bed(?) and expects you to remain a friend? the worst that can happen is just going back to the stage after "something happened"
thing is she still misses her EX, and She already knows I like her. She kept telling me she wants to work on herself first and focus @ work, and wouldn't want to commit to a relationship yet. The reason i hold back is because I know if I go further it will push her away instead of drawing her to me. There is a couple people who are chasing her too. thats the frustrating part lol
The problem is not whether or not you should go further. The key is to go further, and know how to do it properly. The only reason why she would be pushed away, is if you go further, but you mess shit up and creep her out. Girls get pushed away when they get creeped out. And so what if other people are chasing her? These are just excuses. I've made excuses before, and majority of guys have made excuses before.
Good Point, the excuses I made are to make myself feel better for not "making the move" I agree with you 100% on that. Well... our friends and people already does think we're dating, and when they ask we simply say were "friends..." haha Her rejection to herself is what confusing me lol Any suggestions about how should I ease in?
Im telling u ur just a shoulder to cry on.... Girls love it when a guy gives them some special attention when theyre heart broken erc She tells u she is missing her ex... An interested girl would never do that. It means ur in the friend zone. So just go ahead n move on....
^ my friends hit up a couple girls who just broke up with their bf , unfortunately for them he's a straight player .. =x if you move on without trying you'll never know. You got a chance since she's single again so go for it even if you get rejected its better then nothing.. only you will know how to pace yourself in this.
Yea ur friend might be the type who does those things but the OP has already had 4 chances... If it was supposed to happen it wouldve already...
it stops happening when she slaps him in the face :laugh: but i think hes going to have to pace himself with this and keep up being a frend and more then just a friend and eventually she'll open up. The easiest way and less waste of time is to straight up ask her "do you like me?" to see if he has a chance and if she says yes then something like "will you let me wait for you?" and work on it for a few months now that he let her know that he's waiting for her. *what am i saying? didn't he say he cuddled with her and stuff and she sleeps over? ok ask her something like ... "do you want to be with me eventually?", " i can wait for you" she says yes you can work from there, no then move on.
We did have an agreement that I will help her to move on and work on herself, and work. Until she would like a relationship I already told her a few times that I like her, and I'm serious. She never said no to me. However, if she really doesn't have feelings for me she wouldnt do all these stuff with me right? Like she just came over yesterday again for food and cuddled for like couple hours, and we were together for like the whole day. P.S. oh, she doesnt mention that she misses her ex in front of me, she knows she doesnt want to, we talked about that too But on her tumblr she would have posts about how she misses him here now and then.
This may sound like a crude example, but if the fish bites, reel it in. No point letting the fish and bait rot in the water.
I am kinda embarrass to admit that it happened to me. I moved over, and she belonged to sombody else. Looking back, maybe a bad decision..maybe not. I will never know for sure now!? But nothing stops me from thinking back to the what ifs.. I guess its life. Live by the decision you take, bare the responsibilities you make. So if you do not want to regret, then you must show more of an interest and be more bold about it if you are serious to make this happen. If she has other choices..she will not stick around forever. Her interest will switch suddenly..be warned!!!
ask yourself whether u really like her ... if yes ... tell her otherwise, just stay at where u guys r ryt now... because it is really hurt (both of u) when find out u guy are not completely good for each other... by the way ... why men always want to have sex before starting a serious relationship?????
