Resident Evil 5 Retribution [2012] Review

ralphrepo · Sep 16, 2012

Boy of boy; what a whopping disappointment... My personal rating of 1 of 5; and I only gave the one star because of hottie Li Bing Bing.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1855325/

OMG, how lame this franchise has become; in an effort to beget "more" the entire resident evil series has gotten to the point of being so unbelievable that it doesn't even deserve watching. The biggest mistake that it made was painting itself into a corner years ago by creating monsters that cannot be killed, that can move at the speed of sound, that can morph itself into different bulletproof entities; whatever. In other words, how is it possible to fight against such things with basic handguns and small arms, no matter how fancy? It's humanly impossible, so why bother? In conflicts, there has to be at least a modicum of a slim fighting chance, without which it's just slaughter. But even then, so what? According to the franchise's premise ever since RE3, The world as we know it is already done for, LOL... That's the problem facing producers of any subsequent RE sequels; namely, how the heck can you make an "already done for" world interesting and worth fighting for? That's the creative corner that they painted themselves into. In their effort to make ever more interesting 'boss' levels, they made things so bad, ie. created a story hole so deep, that they now can't climb back out of. I'm sure that they wish they could go back to the days of regular zombies because, as we can see in the Walking Dead series, regular zombies still sells very well.

Gosh, ...where are all the movie goers?

Speaking of which, in RE5, no one ever seems to run out of bullets. Anyone who has ever fired anything on full auto can easily attest to how fast one can run out of ammunition. In between the firefight (and yes, it's just one big firefight that never seems to end) the action is basically impossible kung fu martial arts that would do Wuxia proud. Zombies? Oh... there were... maybe a few... but if one blinked, one would miss them. They only lasted about two minutes. RE had done away with Zombies long ago. If anyone wants Zombies, go catch the Walking Dead; there are no Zombies left in RE. In this latest chapter, it's supposed to be the end of the world (again) as Mr Sunglasses from RE4 really isn't the bad guy, but rather it now turns out that the Red Queen from Raccoon City, who incidentally had taken over the Umbrella Corporation (a la Terminator's Skynet?) and is now calling all the shots. But, what's the point? The story is so freaking unbelievable that I found myself wanting to go back to check my facebook page. I hate facebook; so one can imagine just how bad this movie was if facebook can pull me away from it.

But, don't take my word for it, here is another opinion:

Resident eviction notice overdue
Franchise's latest flick worst of all
By Katherine Monk,
Postmedia News September 14, 2012

Even video games have a beginning, a middle and an end, but the Resident Evil movie franchise seems to hit the reset button every few years, offering up gratuitous violence and Milla Jovovich's cleavage for the camera in the hopes of getting one more stack of quarters from your pocket. At this point they might as well, because they've cloned the central heroine Alice (Jovovich) - ensuring the game-based silliness will exist for as long as the producers feel a lingering desire to dress Jovovich in a black latex battlesuit. And despite the passing of the years, the former model can still pull off the skin-tight look, as well as the martial arts stunts. Granted, it's all done in slow-motion these days with the help of green screens and wires, which reduces the element of showmanship, but nonetheless provides some semblance of entertainment in an otherwise empty package.

Easily the worst outing in an already mediocre movie series, Resident Evil: Retribution opens in a slightly different looking world as Alice walks through a normal suburban home getting her kid ready to go to school. Yet, within seconds, a battle breaks out. Alice tries to save her child as the carnage begins, but she's forced to watch her husband die before the screen turns black. A few moments later, we see her eyes open. She's in a lab-like cell, wearing what appears to be a linen serviette. A short time later, her Plexiglas prison goes off line, a drawer with black latex springs open and she's back to her old self. Or so it would seem, but as the setup explains, the old Alice had special viral abilities endowed through mutation and genetic engineering: She had been used as a guinea pig by a morally bankrupt corporation that created a special zombie virus as a weapon. The corporation thought it had Alice under its thumb, but a mutation allowed her to defeat the zombies - which in turn threatened the ruling power. The only way they could tame Alice was to make her an ordinary human once more, and that's where this story picks up.

Alice is just a regular mortal, and now that she's in the corporation's underwater headquarters, she's going to need a lot of help getting out. Fortunately, her former enemy is now on her side and hacking into the central server in a bid to set her free and start the revolution on the surface. Yes, it's an awfully long setup for a movie that isn't worth the time, but there are moments when you sense people trying to deliver more than violence and lame dialogue. For instance, that opening sequence showing Alice getting her kid ready to go to school is later explained as a virtual scenario featuring clones of Alice and the kid. You see, the underwater facility features several "environments" - giant simulations of the world above. They were created to demonstrate the virus's ability to destroy humanity, but if Alice is going to make it back to the real world, she will have to trace an escape route through virtual suburbia as well as virtual Moscow. This chase story has no inherent dramatic value on its own because there's no character development of the central heroine. Alice is Alice - a plastic action figure in sexually titillating outfits.

Her nemesis is another woman in clingy clothes (Sienna Guillory). At one time, they were best friends and allies, but the buddy was co-opted by the forces of doom. Now, she receives orders to kill Alice through a mechanical bug glued to her chest. The scenes where Alice and her former friend face off could have been fun, but the script fails to exploit the obvious Biblical drama that stands before it, and gets lost in a maze of moronic action sequences that are neither eye-popping nor all that necessary. Where other Resident Evil films at least offered up some interesting special effects, this one looks and feels low-budget, to the point of setting much of the drama in a world that looks exactly like our own in an obvious bid to keep production costs down. Not even the kid plot line is given enough time or concern. Alice finds the cloned child back in the suburban environment where she's been hiding since the opening act. When the kid sees Alice, she thinks it's her mom. Grafting bits and pieces of Alien into the mix, Alice decides to save the kid, even though it will slow her down. Jovovich does her best to bring some genuine edge to a generic exercise, but without help from the outside, all her efforts are squandered in this whistling cinematic vacuum where every character feels cloned and every scrap of plot feels cliched. At least Alice was shown an exit by a benevolent force from above. The moviegoer will have to grope for the door alone.

Source: http://www.thestarphoenix.com/enter...nt+eviction+notice+overdue/7240603/story.html
Click to expand...

turbobenx · Sep 16, 2012

was it that bad?

ralphrepo · Sep 16, 2012

turbobenx said: ↑

was it that bad?
Click to expand...

Granted, I saw a Russian cam job version of it, but there was simply no story, just a lot of fast paced run and gun, with a big kung fu match at the end. Oh, don't worry, they left the door open for RE6. But, IMHO if Milla Jovovich has any self respect, she should refuse to continue in this horrific treatment of what used to be one of the best horror franchises.

shinobi · Sep 16, 2012

not to be a pooper but http://www.dramasian.com/forum/f25/resident-evil-retribution-2012-a-75603/

asiankidremix · Oct 15, 2012

I gave up on this movie series after the second movie. They were so bad that I just couldn't continue on with the 3rd or 4th movie. After hearing bad reviews about this one, I'm just gonna skip it too. Save your time and watch the new resident evil anime called "Damnation". Its better than this crap.

zaelyne · Dec 23, 2012

They should just reset this series and recast everyone. Bring in some better writers so there is a good story line. It isn't so hard because they can just copy the game.

Resident Evil 5 Retribution [2012] Review

ralphrepo Well-Known Member

turbobenx .........

ralphrepo Well-Known Member

shinobi PA ='(

asiankidremix Well-Known Member

zaelyne Member