Social anxiety

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Jay89, Apr 27, 2007.

  1. Jay89

    Jay89 Well-Known Member

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    Anyone have social anxiety? I was wondering if any asians have it. I have it and it's really limiting my life.
     
    #1 Jay89, Apr 27, 2007
    Last edited: Apr 28, 2007
  2. DuchSauce

    DuchSauce Well-Known Member

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    A lot of Asian people are shy, but I don't know of any who actually have been diagnosed with anxiety disorder.

    Are you getting treated?
     
  3. xiaojia

    xiaojia Well-Known Member

    Hmm.. mind sharing some personal experiences? Maybe some of us have it without being aware if it.
     
  4. Lilydream

    Lilydream Well-Known Member

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    what do u mean by social anxiety? do u mean that u can't go out from your house because you scare other? like agoraphobia?
     
  5. DuchSauce

    DuchSauce Well-Known Member

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    it's different from agoraphobia, going out isn't a problem, social encounters is.
     
  6. xiaojia

    xiaojia Well-Known Member

    ^lol.. isnt that very common then?

    Cos when Im well prepared for a presentation, it hardly occurs, but if I didn't, I will usually be more anxious. Thought that was normal.. and sth that we can learn to overcome.. no? Or does it require medical treatment?
     
  7. DuchSauce

    DuchSauce Well-Known Member

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    Its supposedly more extreme than just stage fright, you could have an anxiety attack, weep, experience excessive sweating, nausea, shaking, etc.
     
  8. Jay89

    Jay89 Well-Known Member

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    I am a guy. I get social anxiety sometimes... most of the times it is just shyness. I am not getting treated. Its hard for me to speak in front of a group of people when they are watching me; I get nervous and my voice trembles a bit. When I am with some people, I cant think of anything to say... my social skills are lacking. I would get really shy when I talk to girls. Sometimes when I eat I would think that someone is watching me and I start to get nervous. It only happens when I get self conscious and think about what I am doing. It is hard to make friends and socialize when you have SA.

    One thing for everyone:
    If you talk to someone and they give you bad eye contact, it doesnt mean that they dont like you. They just have social anxiety. They know what they are doing is weird, but their mind does it automatically. People with social anxiety also have wandering eyes sometimes.. NO they are not pervs. They are just worried that they might look at something they are not supposed to, and when they think about something they dont want to do, they do it. Its complicated.
     
  9. xiaojia

    xiaojia Well-Known Member

    ^ so you dun get any extreme reactions mentioned by DuchSauce? Then perhaps you just need more practice. Getting nervous is really normal.. And there are probably many reasons and ways to overcome it.

    For me, as mentioned above, I get nervous when I'm not confident with the subject matter I'm speaking about. So preparing for it or increasing my knowledge helps build my confidence and overcome anxiety when speaking in public.

    And I also learn to look straight at people and observe their expressions. It helps me gauge whether Im getting the attention, positive or negative, allowing me to respond accordingly.

    So perhaps what you can do is find out why you get nervous. And more importantly, what gives you confidence and work on that. Hope this helps :)
     
  10. wind2000

    wind2000 Self Schemata

    From the description of your syndrome, socialize more and this anxety will disappear. Its normal to be blank while in front of the class when you are not used to do presentation, and getting tongue tied in front of ppl.
     
  11. ab289

    ab289 Well-Known Member

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    right .. face your fear. plus, public speaking is an acquired skill.
     
  12. DuchSauce

    DuchSauce Well-Known Member

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    Right, it looks like it's just nerves, try to open up more, you'll see that most people are friendly.
     
  13. Jay89

    Jay89 Well-Known Member

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    I have been to social phobia forums and read about some people. To me, it seems that the more you think about it the more social anxiety you are going to get. On those forums, there are guys that are 60 years old and have not been on dates because of social anxiety.
     
  14. DuchSauce

    DuchSauce Well-Known Member

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    Maybe their problem is that they are on a forum talking about their social anxiety, rather than doing something about it. Don't end up like them.
     
  15. wind2000

    wind2000 Self Schemata

    I detect a bit of hyponchrondia. Just try to join clubs where ppl share the same interests as you, like chess, cards, ..... and try to socialize from there.
     
  16. Fizzyboy

    Fizzyboy Active Member

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    Don't blame your problems on a condition or disorder. Just deal with it like everyone else.

    Guess what? Alot of people have social problems. There is nothing "especially" wrong with you.
     
  17. xiaojia

    xiaojia Well-Known Member

    Hanging ard people with the same fear, who has yet to overcome it themselves is useless. What expert opinion can they give? The only reason to go there is perhaps to seek solace..

    Socialize is key. Go hang out more. Find some place you are comfortable with. And dun get too stress up. Take it easy.

    If you really think you need help, go for seminars or talks instead.
     
  18. wind2000

    wind2000 Self Schemata

    Thats exactly what i meant. Instead of going into so much details about his "existing" condition (which in my opinion is more like the lack of socialization), he should join clubs where ppl do things that he likes. When you like to do something, and with ppl who share the same interests as you, you develop confidence and at the same time, you enjoy yourself. Sorry if i was a bit unclear in the previous post. ;)
     
  19. xiaojia

    xiaojia Well-Known Member

    lol.. and hang ard PA more..

    Wait...

    We must have some socializing issues ourselves since we practically live here.. hmm.. lets reconsider this.. are our opinions the same as those 60 yr old you meet at the social phobia forums.. -lol
     
  20. DuchSauce

    DuchSauce Well-Known Member

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    I'm just broke.