Confused..

Discussion in 'Love and Relationships' started by sitorbewwi, Aug 2, 2007.

  1. sitorbewwi

    sitorbewwi Well-Known Member

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    Well.. i broke up with my bf recently
    but i wasn't exactly sad or anything cos I knew it was coming
    but the thing is he said he wanted to be friends cos we talked more as friends
    and to be honest i thought it was true that it was better if we were friends
    but now i feel as if i want him back?
    well like maybe not to bf/gf extent but like
    slightly more than friends..
    so i was going to tell him how i felt today.. but then my friend told me it was kinda pointless
    SO.. i'm wondering what i should do
    i'm not quite obsessive about being his gf again..
    i just want it to be more than friends.. but less than lovers? if that makes sense..
    any comments? =)
     
  2. bionca88

    bionca88 Well-Known Member

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    When you mentioned u want slightly more than friends but not bf/gf, isn’t that’s how a relationship started from? Being more than friends? So I take it as you actually want him back as bf/gf. There’s no reason why you would want him as more than friends if you does not feel for him.

    My advise, since both of you feel that your relationship are more as friend, if that’s the main reason why you both broke up, I believe it’s because you both does not love each other enough but just liking for each other. I don’t see how a relationship with love, would talk/treat to each other like a friend.

    Or it could be your ex- bf does not loves you enough to treat you like how a relationship should be, that’s is why you feel both of you are like friends and not in a relationship.

    I suggest not to tell him first, be as friends , if both of you are meant for each other, relations will eventually bloom. Let it happen naturally, if he is meant for you he is yours.

    Take care girl, all the best.
     
  3. zero_c

    zero_c Well-Known Member

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    I kind of understand what you mean, but I think its probably a bad idea to tell him now. I say stay as friend for now and see if your feelings or his feelings come back.
     
  4. kdotc

    kdotc 안녕하세요빅뱅K-Dragon입니다

    give urself some time to think about this
     
  5. i think you just miss him since his been with you all the time for a period.. but just gime it some time.. and rethink about it in 1month
     
  6. nyckeion

    nyckeion ....Boo....

    then just be close friends just no physical contact then you guys are just as good as friends then you dont have to be worrying aobut if you should or shouldnt be his gf
     
  7. ab289

    ab289 Well-Known Member

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    sounds like you want a midnight booty call or friends with benefits?
     
  8. MissCheekS

    MissCheekS Reconnaîssant ❤

    id say...just wait and see what happens...
    ur confused right now so u dont even know if u really want him back or if ur just missing the companionship i guess... the thing is once u break up with ur bf and keep hanging out with him and hes being nice to u...
    u will mostly get the feeling u wanna have him back....at least thats my experience...

    dont do anything before u r sure u really want him back.....
     
  9. skid

    skid Well-Known Member

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    in my experience these things don't usually work out too well. There should be no reason why you would want to be more than friends with him unless you still like him. I would suggest just staying as friends and moving on with life. Being single is fun as well *refer to the other threads :)
     
  10. kashigal

    kashigal Well-Known Member

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    Give yourself time to rationalize about the whole situation. Don't let impulse make you regret all your life.

    Because you have recently broke up, probably the emotions attached is still lingering. The best way to rationalize is "Time" because it really cools down your head and your heart =)
     
  11. Phoenix

    Phoenix *~Though she be but little, she is fierce~*

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    i know how u feel kinda...
    ur confused cos u miss having sum1 close to you who understands u n whatnot..
    so u'll start to get close to him again...yet even when ur heart hopes to be more..u'll only be friends..nothing more..then you'll be more hurt...
    so i say give urself some time to think it through...and maybe things will work out..but in the mean time be friends with him..but um..form a barrier around ur heart..if that makes sense? so u can still be close but not close close...a means of protection cos u mite end up hurting more...

    i hope this helps =S ..but take cares...in the end..you'll be ok..
     
  12. ah_wong201

    ah_wong201 Well-Known Member

    friends with benefits? tell him that, i'm sure he'll be down with that
     
  13. danchua

    danchua Member

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    Maybe becoz you are so used to him being around as a bf that the sudden change of status makes you feel that there's a vacumm around and you wanna fill this vacumm. Suggest you give urself some time.
     
  14. like i've said before talking to the ex usually screws up a girl's emotions n confuses her... if u keep talking to him the "yo-yo" effect applies... u don't really love him... but ur so used to having him around u'd feel lonely without him... even if u do get back with him u guys will break up again in a very short time...

    block him out of ur life girl... u can live without him... n don't give urself an excuse like "i don't wanna lose a fd" b coz it's not a genuin friendship to begin with... good luck on ur recovery...
     
  15. sitorbewwi

    sitorbewwi Well-Known Member

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    thanks guys.. helped so much.. =)
    kinda got to think about it over the night..
    and yeh..decided i should get to know him better first as a friend
    owe you people so lot ..even tho i don't really know you guys ..but yehh haha
    thanks for the adviceee !
    i'm already feeling better now
     
  16. aniking_7

    aniking_7 Well-Known Member

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    Do you mean like a sibling sort of relationship?
     
  17. sitorbewwi

    sitorbewwi Well-Known Member

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    ..nooo i don't think so o_O lols
    haha that was quite a different approach to the idea.. but yeh thanks anyway
     
  18. ipepsi

    ipepsi Well-Known Member

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    friends with benefits?
     
  19. flying_pumpkin_88

    flying_pumpkin_88 Well-Known Member

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    ab289's right ~ .. i understand you want to be a little more than friends and not bf/gf .. it kinda gives yoO less pressure of being there for each other 24/7 .. i was in the same situation last year~ ><;; buut .. it wasn't me who wanted to be " friends with benefits " .. it was the guy who i was seeing who wanted it ~ .. he wanted me to do well for my HSC ~ yes .. skewl -what? which i kinda found it the biggest bull crap ! he though .. " well .. if we're not going out .. then yoO can concentrate on yoOr studies. " .......................... the thing is .. we still saw each other ~ ........................

    i dunno .. he might think the same as yoO .. buut i noe i didn't enjoy the process at all coz i didn't want it and he did ~ o_____O;; so i guess make sure yoO guys discuss about it and think long and hard about it ! =)
     
  20. MissCheekS

    MissCheekS Reconnaîssant ❤

    Im glad ur feeling better!
    I dont know u....but...i know...break ups can get ugly and confusing....
    No worries! uUwill get over it soon enough.....!

    -flow