What is the age range of the girl or guy you prefer to date? How old do you prefer him or her to be and what would you consider to be the "normal" age limitation? And finally, does age REALLY matter in the long run? Here's my OWN situation: I know a guy who is 9 years older than me and I'm only 20. >.< The thing is, after talking to him for a while, I realize we do have a lot of common interests and similarities, other than the fact that of course, he's already graduated a while back and is obviously working full-time. And I'm still in school. Is it normal to become attracted to a guy of whom I'm only 2/3 of his age? And if we were to go into a relationship (hypothetically speaking), is there too wide of an age gap to even consider dating? Some of our interests and perspectives might differ since he's older, but what if you really like him for who he is on the inside and he likes you back as well? Just wondering...Do you think this is weird? What are your opinions on this? I'm faced with uncertainties...-unsure
9 years isn't that big an age difference. HOWEVER, I have my reserve on whether it would work out, just because you are 20 = young and likely to be still in school. Of course, if you can tough the schooling years out, good for you (and him). But you still have to consider, he would ALWAYS age faster than you, when you are at your most rewarding age (40-45), he would be considering his retirement (50-55). Relationship always boils down to the person/couple, there are couples with huge age difference which worked out, there are couples who are approximately the same age which ends in tears. Just remember: there's no loss as long as you don't regret the decision. Make a decision and run with it, and to hell with the "what if"s.
Whoah....there are quite a few threads about age gaps... & i keep on saying the same thing lol.... If ur mature for ur age &/if hes young & doesnt look very old...why not.... i know a couple the guy is only 5 years older but i have the feeling that the difference is way bigger than my other friend whos 20 and dating a 30 year old... I have the feeling that older guys suit me better too....i prefer a guy around 26 now... Cuz i reckon guys who are 21ish are younger in mind....and they say girls grow mature a bit faster.... Sooo....an older guy....why not.....More mature....& feel more secure i guess? The only thing u gotta make sure is...that hes not already looking for someone to get married with... i assume ur not into that since ur only 20years old!? everything is ok...as long as your both cool with it & the vibe is right...why not give it a shot? some ppl might talk about u or give u comments u dont like to hear especially when ur chinese...but just ignore id dont listen to what others say...do what U feel like -flow goodluck~
it is a pretty big gap...my parents are 8 years apart, of cuz age plays a role in relationships, especially if he's 29, he's getting mature but you're still at ur early 20s, u wanna have fun (although u might deny it, but come on, girls want fun.) however if u guys are really serious about it, it should be fine. =] best wishes. <3
When you are conscious that age is a factor then your relationship will not work out. When you are NOT conscious of age as a factor then it will work out! You have to learn that when you have discriminatory thoughts, this discrimination will drive you away from the person to whom you have the negative thoughts.A negative thought means doubt. However you can have such doubts initially and you should not really have them when the relationship matures successfully.
that age gap isnt a big deal, its just that your situtation is, i mean hes working full time while your still in school hypothetically, it can work out if your willing to work out the kinks
If you think about it, You might be 2/3 of his age now but as you grow older this wont be the case. Besides the fertility or men usually last longer than that of a women so if your worried bout ..... ya know.... it doesnt really matter. On a side note, Men are like fine wine, getting more refined as they age and women are like the flowers of the field hose ephemeral beauty last's but one spring season
what matters is what YOU view as the age limitation you are comfortable with. ideally, for me, a few years older. if you have a mindset that age does matter than it will but if you don't care then you really won't. it's all in the mind. hah. don't worry about attraction because i'm sure other people, not just you and including me, have been attracted to guys who are more than a few years older than us. the real questions is: are you feelings just feelings of infatuation or can you actually envision both of you in a relationship together? like i said before it's all in the mind. so make sure if you were to go into this relationship that you feel confident about it or doubts will start leaking in and eventually cause problems.
That's true and I agree with what you said. It really depends on what age he's planning to get married. I don't plan to myself until after I graduate...so about 24 or 25 years of age. Then that would mean he would be around 33/34... Yup, I generally prefer older and more mature men. I recently knew a guy who was 23 and was interested in me, but we had differences and his character didn't appeal to me in the end. So it seems like I have more in common with a 29 than a 23-year old. So maybe age isn't exactly a significant factor in this case. My intention is not to discriminate, but to be realistic in terms of what type of situations will arise out of this apparent age difference so that I might be able to foresee any type of problems that may come out of the relationship. However, I know that when two people truly love each other, age will definitely not be factor that will pull these two people apart. A lot of "what-ifs" come to my mind since we're not "officially" in a relationship yet and I'm trying to perceive this from a long-term point of view. Moreover, this has been around my mind for a while and I'm constantly burdened by the fact that there are so many things to put into consideration if there is such a significant age gap. But of course, if everything works out fine, then that'd be great. Right now, we're good friends, and I was thinking ahead to the future if we do end up seriously dating. If I was any younger, then I'd probably play around with relationships like they were toys because, yes, I wanted to have fun back then (about 5 yrs ago). But at this age, I'm starting to regard love and relationships as a more serious component of life and I am not into casual dating at all (this was why I rejected the 23-year old guy I mentioned about earlier who wanted to immediately jump into dating - and that wasn't my thing). I really want to get to know a person better, and if he's really my type of guy, then I'd go for it. To have been able to give this situation such in-depth thought and consideration apparently means that I do regard this seriously... Very true and I agree wholeheartedly with what you said. Love and infatuation are two very different things. Infatuation is simply attributed to superficial feelings that are guaranteed not to last long, but I don't associate my feelings with infatuation. I like him for who he is in terms of his character attributes and his personality, and exterior, to me, does not matter in this case. However, I think I'll take a bit more time to get to know him as a regular friend first in order that I can determine whether or not I can truly envision myself as his significant other. Dating and relationships are serious concepts and should not be taken lightly or merely for fun. I ought not to rush myself; otherwise, it wouldn't work.
Okay.....since u agree to what we said.... what are u waiting for....!! Go and seduce him!!! Ur not supposed to think that much.....! Love with ur heart not with ur mind! -rockon
i guess its not as bad as say.. 17 and like...27, meaning underage little girl and pedophilic bastard
I had the same problem last year, my boyfriend older than me 10 years. i always ask myself, is he right for me??? or am i right for him??? age is a problem in the relationship. it is all depent on you and him. if you love him and want to be with him then age is not a problem, but if you worry and care so much about the age gap, then you are putting problem into your relationship.
yesyes there are indeed many threads on this but I think as long as your relationship doesn't involve pedophilia, then it's cool
i think waiting is a wise choice. i'm not saying waiting for a decade but just waiting until you two are on a more common playing field. you're still going to school and he's working? maybe when you're nearly done with school and getting a job would be a great time for both of you to get together. if he can't wait just a little longer then maybe his feelings aren't as strong as yours. or. you could talk to him about it. and seeing as how mature he is (or should be) i'm sure he'll respond.
its not a big differnce when u get older but when u're still young it IS a big difference....love overrules age
