When to give up?

Discussion in 'Love and Relationships' started by zippyw8, Dec 14, 2007.

  1. zippyw8

    zippyw8 Well-Known Member

    54
    31
    0
    seeking for ppl's advice.

    ur chasing a girl, u have gain her trust and became a pretty close friend to her. however, during that time her ex has always been in the back of her mind. as of today, she's back with her ex, but not certain if things will work out as their relationship is not solid. the reason she didn't go out with you is because her ex is still a possiblility in her mind.

    shoudl you continue to be by her side and possibly hope for their relationship to end so you can step in? or should you move on?

    this girl means a lot to you, you are very serious with her, she could be the one for the rest of your life.
     
  2. lee-lee

    lee-lee Well-Known Member

    1,384
    86
    0
    u gotta speak up dude. girls have this tendency to not notice the best guy friend. it's sorta like, "well, we're such good friends. he's like the one good guy friend i have. if we start a relationship, and it doesn't work, then that means our friendship will be over" u DONT' wanna be that guy. don't wait too long to tell her.
    and quite honestly, they aren't married. alls fair in love and war.
     
  3. hoi_lee

    hoi_lee Well-Known Member

    220
    41
    0
    stick by her, i mean, if you really like her a lot, then you wouldn't mind who she's with, as long as she's happy.

    if you stick by her side, she'll realise who really cares about her ^^
     
  4. champ91

    champ91 Well-Known Member

    175
    41
    0
    take a chance and talk to her. If things don't work out then move on. don't waste time
    ________
    FORD FAMILY TREE HISTORY
     
    #4 champ91, Dec 14, 2007
    Last edited: Mar 12, 2011
  5. koogepanini

    koogepanini Well-Known Member

    288
    53
    1
    I guess it depends if she's happy with her ex. I mean, at one point, if it doesn't work out between them anymore, then you should definitely tell her how you feel. But if they're happy together, there's no point creating unnecessary problems.
     
  6. xdly

    xdly Well-Known Member

    584
    68
    0
    Tell her what you feel... she'll make a choice... and for you everything becomes clear ;)
     
  7. wind2000

    wind2000 Self Schemata

    I think you should wait a little before making a move since shes back with her ex. Should they not work out, then comes your turn cuz in the event that you step in now, most probable is that she would think if she rejects you, she will lose your friendship and there goes your chance and it will make it hard on both of you.
     
  8. vintage

    vintage Well-Known Member

    97
    31
    0
    Heres my take:

    Its obvious she still has feelings for her ex. And even though you think their relationship isn't solid. It probably is.

    To wait for a girl to become single again, is to wait a very very long time.

    Consider: There are 6 billion people in this world, and half of them are women. You will never meet every women in your lifetime. Why not meet as many as you can? If you can enrich a person's life but putting a smile on their face. Why not?

    That could be the problem, she means a lot to you. When she gets home, what is she thinking about? Probably not you.

    The more you chase, the more she is repelled.

    Your already thinking way to ahead of yourself. A relationship is still far out of the question.

    Consider: You may not be the one she'll be with forever.
    But you will be the one she'll remember.
     
  9. tiffystars

    tiffystars Well-Known Member

    255
    53
    0
    stay by her side and be there for her...support her for what she wants to do...
    and one day she really will know how much you mean to her and that you were there all along...

    but do know that you may meet new ppl soon...and find another girl who maybe be "the one" =P !!!
     
  10. aserena

    aserena Member

    10
    226
    0
    i'd ask you to confront her, the waiting sucks and kills.....
    you don't know how long you're going to wait and if you wait, how do you know that you'll continue to see them together.....
    no one can tell you when to give up, you can only give up when you're ready
     
  11. aserena

    aserena Member

    10
    226
    0
    you will eventually give up b/c as time progress your heart will slowly let go
    the waiting is just gonna kill you, i can tell u that from personal experience
     
  12. zippyw8

    zippyw8 Well-Known Member

    54
    31
    0
    so agree with ya...
     
  13. zippyw8

    zippyw8 Well-Known Member

    54
    31
    0
    that seems like the only thing i can do...
     
  14. zippyw8

    zippyw8 Well-Known Member

    54
    31
    0
    thanks for the advice...

     
  15. Aznguy123

    Aznguy123 Well-Known Member

    562
    68
    0
    move on!!! your still young i'm guessing.. so explore!!! you will see maybe funny people out there.
     
  16. ede559

    ede559 Well-Known Member

    57
    31
    0
    i am in a similar situation to you mate;

    the girl i like broke up with her ex recently and the truth is, you have to tell her you like her...I DID!!!

    Girls know if a guys likes them, but they tend to not show or do anything until you tell them. You have to tell her, you never know, she may actually be waiting for you to say those words...

    I told her I liked her and she told me she knew and was waiting for me to make a move but she wants more time before getting into another realtionship. I bought her a Tiffany necklace for Christmas and am gonna take her to dinner at a nice hotel restaurant....wish me luck like I am wishing you luck...
     
  17. ^ dude you cant just ask a girl out right after she breaks up... it would show that a girl would do anything not to be single. and any girl wouldnt want that
     
  18. ede559

    ede559 Well-Known Member

    57
    31
    0
    actually i know of some girls who will not break out of a unhappy relationship just so they aren't lonely afterwards and I also know girls who gets a new bf days after breakups....so...
     
  19. smallrinilady

    smallrinilady Well-Known Member

    i say STICK BY HER

    and kinda confront her
    dont go all out "I"M IN LOVE WITH YOU" cause that might scare her

    let her know you care about her, that you're there for her
    and whether or not she choses you, that you'll be there for her
    just back off half way (not entirely) if she thinks that she will chose her ex
     
  20. Simonly

    Simonly Well-Known Member

    46
    31
    0
    Sounds like a korean drama in a way. I say move on as many here have said. If over this time she has no feelings then don't even bother.