So here is my problem… My ex and I split up couple months ago due to one big issue; trust. We were together almost 4 years but he cheated on me 4 months after we started dating. I lost a lot of trust in him and that didn’t make our relationship go well the whole time because I always have that thought in the back of my head he will never change. After we broke up, he flew out of state twice to see that girl he cheated with and the second time he was there, they had sex. Then I found out the girl is totally in love with him right now. He talks to her because he said she gives him the attention that I don’t give, and she does those cutesy things. He said the reason he would not date her cause she likes lots of attention from guys in public and she lives in another state. Then he said he trusts me but its sad that I don’t give him the attention that he wants right now. I told him that I am willing to work things out, change the way I look at him and trust him. At the same time, I have stopped doing certain things that he doesn’t like such as going out at night, talking to certain guys but he still talks to her. I feel like I am putting the effort but I am not getting anything back from this or him. Right now we are supposed to be working things out... I know I shouldn’t go back but something keeps on pulling me back to him. I feel lost and I don’t know if I should keep on trying or leave it… =(
LEAVE 一次不忠，百次不用 The thing that keeps pulling you back is DOUBT. You doubt is there still love between you guys, after all, 4 years is quite a long time....JUST LEAVE THIS LOSER & find someone that's better. This kinda guy dares to cheat this publicly and tells you, oh u aren't giving any attention to me so i'm gonna find comfort from other girls ------- LAME! From your description above i found this guy to be very selfish of himself: doesn't allow you to talk to other guys? WTF? but he CAN & fuck other girls? You better stay strong, don't let this loser take anymore advantage from you. Calm yourself down and go to somewhere new where you can think & decide calmly. If you don't feel insecure & think there's always something wrong, SAY GOODBYE. There shouldn't be that many doubts & rules in a healthy relationship.
i am sorry but he sounds like an asshole.... n the answer is NO...u shouldnt stay with him He cheated on u after only 4 months dating....i dont get that...isnt that supposed to be the honeymoon period where u dont even wanna touch another girl but ur gf....anyway that shouldve already been reason for u to call it quits... ur not supposed to cheat on someone n then try to work things out anyway.... from what i hear he doesnt even respect u or ur feelings... cheating on u is bad enough but to keep in touch n then fly over to c her when u guys are in a break up n then come back to u.... hes such a hypocrite....ur not allowed to go out at nite cuz hes so jealous...but yet he is still in touch with the girl he cheated with...why do u allow him to do these things... i cant believe u take this! break up with him!!!!!!!!!!!
Leave him You are supposed to work on a relationship 2getter, so why do you have to be the only one to make changes? He basically is taking away your freedom/ your social life/etc, so you would only focus your attention on him. That’s not how things roll in a relationship. He isn’t worth to spend your time on him, you already wasted 4 years. Leave him, he isn’t worth it. *You made him sound like a loverboy*
Should I stay or should I go? If I go there will be trouble And if I stay it will be double Did you read what you just wrote??? He's making YOU feel guilty for something HE did. There's never an excuse for cheating. If he felt that you weren't giving him the kind of attention he needed, he should have told you or broken it off early on, not see someone else behind your back for 4 years. Only reason why he didn't do either of those things is because he's selfish and wants the best of both worlds. Stop wasting your time on him, fannie.
what theeeeee, how the hell did it last 4 years if you didn't trust him after only 4 months of going out? LEAVE HIS ASS!!! He sounds like a huge fucking douchebag. He's totally trying to make excuses for his cheating by blaming you on not giving him enough. It is not your fault he's a douche!! lol LEAVE HIMMMMMM!!
LEAVE seriously man it works both ways you have made the big step of trying to trust him and doing things to make him happy but what is he doing to keep you happy and making you to keep the trust in him... as you said he is still tlaking to that girl he is cheating on and usually in these cases people like these cheats over and over again because he thinks he can get away with it due to you are doing everything that he wants you to do and the reason why he trusts you just leave and find someone who deserves you
You shouldn't have to change your life for anyone. Specially not this guy. I hope you learned alot form this relationship and with that avoid the same mistakes in the next and have a more pleasent experience with the next person. A relationship should be fun and carefree and you deserve to be happy so yes, leave and look at these past four years as a learning experience.
lol fannie, the dude is a douche, and you know damn well he's a douche the question here is what are you going to do now? A) listen to us B) go back with him if you choose B, then consider yourself just like him.
I agree with the verdict BUT NOT "once a cheater is always a cheater" .. people make mistake in life and they can change for the better ...
i am glad for you and your correct decision. some people don't listen to advice given, after they ask for help, and end up getting back together, and have emo shit all over again.
Man you let this lasted 4 years after he cheated after the first 4 months damn.... But good thing you leave him now, cut all connection with him too Yeah, we saw heaps of this kind of shit and even gone to the point of custy bitches battle it out :riaa:
sigh, i dont know. that time i didnt want to give up and i thought people would change after their mistakes i guess. apparently not everyone! >:[
Old habits die hard. Few people are capable of changing, but it's better for you to assume that your BF is not one of those rare exceptions. Haven't you seen "He's Just Not That Into You?" All my girl friends and their sisters have seen it.
^ yeah n buy the book...its very good lol... after that u can buy the book " its called a break up because its broken" which will help too Anyway, Fannie... hope u can stick to ur decision n dont go weak when hes being all nice...!!! G'luck!
