For those of you who are still in high school or just started in college/university....this might not be applicable to you. Just live out the fantasy land in the mean time. For the males out there...just keep on working on your game...u'd be alright. (Pls just click to the next thread) For those of you who are not in the above group of people...pls comment on this question. Especially for the ladies out there. I've been hearing this word thrown around from my female friends for the last year or so. Words such as "security", "potential" slowly creep up. While most people who post here either have problems with a) self confidence and the failure to understand the laws of attraction and have to act upon them, b) failure to express their interest with someone without creeping them out and c) to obtain random statistics for general curiosity that will neither help anyone nor indicate something that the vast majority does not know. Today I present to you with a different kind of problem. I am 22 right now, average looking 6"1 and weigh 210 pounds. It seems like the quality of women I'd dated a few years ago are now out of my league. Out of my years of wooing girls, I've learned how to read people pretty well. I pay attention to the smallest details of social interactions, the facial expressions, any gestures or even unusual behaviors that a person's trying to hide. I've even slowly but surely learn how to grab one's attention and not lose it. Yet despite all I do, I'll not be perfect at all times to only show that I am human as well. For years, due to age and maturity....there'd be adjustments to be made. Like any human, thoughts and train of thoughts are different even with people of different ages. (my days of wooing girls are no more...I've changed; I can't look in the mirror and lie to myself anymore) Suprisingly due to my past success with my observation and adaptation skills, they've helped me with knowing how to deal with my parents, especially with my mom who just loves to nag like every other asian middle-aged woman. Sometimes I find myself being less than "human" but I gotta do what I have to. Now that I am out of school....at least for "undergrad"....I've quickly found how the world has revolved and what must do to reach their goals. I've found out quickly the difference btw wooing a girl and actually seriously dating one for real. It's a lot more work to do the latter (keeping an exclusive relationship is twice as hard as just starting an open ended one) For most desired women now, there seems to be this "application" process before you get an "interview" if you know what I mean. For you to qualify to even get a chance...you must be "established". Ain't it great? I've got the interview done...I just need to buffer up my resume. Dating/mating is like a job process. If you want to break it down, it is what it is. Don't lie to yourself nor to none of the folks here. If you get the job and the money's not right, you won't take the job. Things can wheel both ways. How important is it to become "established"? It seems like I am better of staying out of a relationship for 5+ years to become an "established" member of society first before I come back in. It seems to me that at my age, improving my portfolio as a member of society (by monetary means) is the next step I have to take. If it means that much to become "established"...I'd do whatever it takes starting now.
erm....ur 22.....that is not that old.....to me that is still a prime time of your life, if there is such a thing. i think i know wot u mean by being established or needing to establish yourself, but kind of feel that there is no need to look at it that way. It is better thought of as improving or building up yourself so you are more attractive to more females. Personally, I would just stop thinking about go after any girl and just focus on the other aspects of your life that are just as important. In time, given some opportunites, you will meet a girl who loves you for who u r and not someone who expects of you something you are not.
All i have to say is, start doing things for yourself. How do you want to be when you get old. Work till ur 80, or become a millionaire when u're 30 and enjoy your life. It's ur own life so live it to the fullest. Make your own decisions on what you think is good for you and not what the females want. A natural way to attract females is being a successful. Best of both worlds.
Being succesfull is a good thing but sometimes in just focusing in being successful can cause you to look away from doing what you wanted in the first place, Also 22? you have got to be kidding dude you are at the prime of your life don't let some mini obstacles start making you question wether the world is still nice or not
wow, ur too serious for a 22 year old. but since u brought this issue up, i will comment. yes, i am one of those girls that will look at ur application b4 i even think of a guy as a potential. maybe i have high standards, but it is just what i prefer. not to make this a sob story, but i've had to work for what i have. i mean really struggle, but i've managed to come this far. so for me, i really don't understand when ppl who don't have the same drive as me. also, i'm committed to attaining the career that i want. i have found that in the past, when i dated guys that didn't take school seriously (or not even their education, but jsut their life in general), they wouldn't care about me and how important it was to do well. fights would happen b/c i couldn't spend enuf time with them or w/e. but back to ur situation, i think ur giving up too fast on this relationship thing. ur young, DATE! but at the same time, work at ur improving ur resume.
