I'm 22 of age, I moved away from Home to start a new life. I have a job and a place to live, when going out with friends im silly and wild but deep inside me I'm hurting inside and depressed with myself. I hate myself, I'am fat and ugly and I'm emotionally fragile. These problems acured when i had a really bad breakup with my ex 3 years ago he put me down,used me,cheated on me 3 times and said horrible things to me. I was forced out of my home town by him and my so called friends. Everyone turned against me and stood on his side even tho they knew what he did to me. He was popular and i was just the mad wild one. To this day i think i'm emotionally f%$%D Up I pushed myself so hard to get over what he did to me. And now Ive done quite good for myself. Im more successful then him, i have my own place to live. But all in all I'm not happy with myself,I'm disgusted with my body and looks. I put on so much weight when i moved down to the south of England, ive been trying so hard to lose weight I go gym and yoga. I even throw up the food i eat thats how much i hate myself. I want to be like the old me skinny and confident, now when any guy goes near me I push them away. I'm scared of getting hurt and I'm worried they would look down on me coz im fat. I look at people on TV who are anorexic or bulimic I want to be like them and I'm considering doing it myself to be skinny. What should I do?
I hope u don't think those people on tv are happy either. Forget the past move onto the future. Those guys are gone and u have new friends enjoy it. I think that when we look at ourselves we always tend to look negatively. We think we are ugly, fat, not perfect when in truth we are just fine but we make ourselves just seem worse and it gets even worse when we feel bad. I think that ur personality is great, your outgoing and silly that makes people like you generally. I personally don't see any negative. The rest of the outside stuff is all dependant on other people. You may not think your pretty but someone out there probably does and u just don't know it. Try not to think of him anymore and just move on with ur life..like find a new bf or enjoy the single life Also ALWAYS LOSE WEIGHT THE RIGHT WAY. Cheating it will make u worse off then u already are. Make new good friends and also know that if you think ur life is better then his then why don't u enjoy ur life instead of looking back. Our lives are short...if we keep looking to the past we tend to miss the future. Enjoy
u should really consider getting professional help. this stuff isn't something that can be fixed overnight nor on a forum. BUT, u have to stop the throwing up thing. instead of focusing on all the negatives, look at all the good stuff. everyone in life has issues, its a matter of looking for the good. even in the worse of situations, there is something good to be found. so this guy dumped? well f*ck him! his lost. dumb loser will prob never go anywhere in life and will stay in ur hometown doing nothing but hallucinating himself into believing that he's so cool. why should u care what others think? stop caring what others think, and look to what is important to YOU!!! u have to realize that u cannot make the world like u. even Jesus had his enemies. u have to learn to make urself happy. ppl on tv are in fantasy land. u cannot compare urself to them. their job is to look perfect. that's how they make money. can u imagine how well twins would do if they were fat (or in this case, look normal weight?) u have to stop comparing urself to them. they are not of normal human world. strive to be healthy. do u really think that by being stick thin is gonna make all ur issues go away? no. this is something u have to resolve within. it goes beyond just ur looks. Learn to love urself girl!!! respect urself first. work out the other stuff slowly.
Actually we all know what to do.. just that we dun do it. Determination and perseverance is always a problem for most ppl. There are many things im not happy with myself too. Things that can be changed. And I know it is a matter of really setting our minds to the task. I suggest you really think through it. Or get professional help. But the most important thing is to help yourself. Watch 'Love on a Diet'. If you really wanna slim down. Do it the healthy way. Watch your diet, not throw up what you eat. Exercise self control. Do the right exercise. Running is good for burning calories. I'm not an expert in this field, neither am I saying it is easy... Just hope you realise that there is a way out of this. When there is a will, there is a way. Hope you succeed!
Professional help can include counseling. It is not sth we should be embarassed abt. If we have a problem we can't handle, face it. Get help. It can also be professional trainers that plan your diet and exercise regime. Considering what you have done and failed, I think it is a possible method to consider as suggested by lee-lee. But of cos I agree that you must start by helping herself, not torturing. -nono
xiaojia, you sound like a professional. and Wongie, these things take time, so don't be too hard on yourself.
dont push yourself too hard also one thing not to do is emo... your gonna get over them i mean who gives a crap about these kind of people the more you think of them the more hurtful you gonna get so just try not to think.... thats what i do.. and dont look down on yourself look on the brighter side "dont look at the cup of water half empty, look at it half way full"
You need to regain your confidences before you can lose the wait.. don't force it.. take it one step at a time... some girls dig heavier dudes... but it's just that you gotta stop trying to be emo and when you're happier... it'll be easier for you to lose the weight.. lol ok reverse that... didn't know you're a girl.. it'll work out either way tho...
Post a picture and let us determine if you're fat or not... Maybe this is too early to break the ice?
professional help might work but lets admit it ... u probly wont seek profesional help.... but as for ur weight problem..... u actually arnt helping urself by throwing it up..... the secret to lossing weight is eatting correctly .... adjust your diet.... you can check on calories of the things u eat online... try to keep the calories down..... n keep a regular work out scedule..... as for the dude...... f**k him.... ull get ur confidence back... n then hell be the one wishing he was back wit u.....
I just want to say, life is not perfect. Everyone is special in their own ways. Imagine a world where everyone looked the same. It would be very boring. If you think life is not fair, think about all the ones without a family or living in the streets. Life is just too short to be wasting time wishing for things. You just gotta start being more positive. I know its not a overnight thing, and you must work really hard for it. If u think ur overweight, start by going out for walks, jog, and then start running. Overall, its ur life and u will always control how u want to live it.
dun be so sad, just be urself, u dun hav to be skinny to be confident, just b urself to get the confident, try control ur intake n do more exercise is the best way,dun ever torture urself. good luck!! by: a fatty guy
Hi wongie, feel bad for u after reading your story ar... Nobody is perfect... I am not always happy about the way I look too sometimes...and I am not the skinniest girl either...but I love myself the way I am... you should be like me...be proud of your curves... Honestly who cares what others think about your looks... Looks dont matter... well maybe on short term...but If you have a good personality then people will accept and love u the way u are... If a person looks down on you because ur not skinny then their not even worth being ur friend. Their not even worth anything at all actually.... just waste of space! Did u know...When you feel good you will shine from within... Always keep this in mind:Who will like you if you dont even like yourself? U know...It's ok to wanna look skinny or wanna lose weight as long as it's in a healthy way... like the others just said... look for professional help. It might help if you could talk to someone about your feelings...at least... I think it would be a good start... You said you go to the gym and take yoga classes but how come u still dont lose weight? Maybe coz u dont go regularly or maybe your doing the wrong exercises? Or u should eat healthier food... like instead of eating snacks eat fruit... and dont eat anything at all 3 hours or something before u go to bed... Goodluck I hope you will feel better soon! Take good care of your own body you have only got one!
i KNOW WELL i FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF i SHINE WITH HAPPINESS, BEFORE I EVEN WENT OUT WITH MY EX I WAS ALL IT! HAPPY CONFIDENT, FULL OF LAUGHS. NOW IM ALL TO SERIOUS AND SO SCARED TO LIKE ANYONE. IM NOT CONFIDENT OVERALL. IVE ONLY TRIED THROWING UP 3 TIMES THATS IT. I KNOW I SHOULDN'T BUT I WANNA FEEL GREAT ABOUT MYSELF AGAIN. I'M A VERY INDEPENDENT WOMEN WHO PUSHED ONE SELF TO THE LIMIT. I PUSHED MYSELF SO HARD TO PROVE TO MY EX I WAS BETTER THEN HIM. AND RECENTLY, HE STARTED CONTACTING ME AGAIN, AND DO YOU KNOW WHY?? COZ HE'S JEALOUS OF ME. SEE HOW WORTHLESS HE CAN BE, BUT I JUST WANT TO LOOK BEAUTIFUL SO HE COULD REGRET ALL THIS SHIT HE DID TO ME. BUT DEEP DOWN I KNOW, WHY SHOULD I BE DOING ALL THIS BECAUSE OF HIM I SHOULD BE DOING IT FOR THE GOOD OF MYSELF. LOOKING AT HOW MY EX HAS EFFECTED ME SO MUCH, IM WORRIED THAT WHEN I DATE AGAIN, IF THINGS TURN OUT BAD I'LL BE EVEN MORE FU&&D UP IN THE HEAD. THATS WHY I CHOOSE TO DISTANCE MYSELF AND BE ALONE COZ I'M SCARED.
Hello wongie, It's not about how many times uve tried to throw up. U just shouldnt do that at all to begin with. It's very bad for your health... Like i've said b4...If u wanna lose weight pay attention to what u eat. If u do that then theres no reason for u to wanna throw up.... Have smaller portions, less meat,more vegetables and fish and dont have snacks... if u feel hungry have some fruit or drink a big glass of water it helps and is also very good for your skin. About ur ex... if he contacts u tell him to go and screw himself.... what the hell is wrong with him? Cheat on u and treat u like trash and come back later to see how ur doing? He is an a.ss. U shouldnt even wanna feel beautiful to make him regret all the things he's done to u... U should wanna feel beautiful because U want that for yourself. If u feel like talking to someone feel free to pm ur email address maybe i can cheer u up a little
You should really consider seeking professional help from a therapist because you seem to have a lot of jumbled inside and they will help you sort out your feelings and feel better about yourself.
yup everyone has at least one really bad moment in their lives.. like that one guy who posted on here about his grandfathers death.. he too lost his gf as well... kinda said too see how people have a hard time of letting go... but hey that's just all part of life.. only thing to do is move on...
there there, i really know how u feel.. i myself fragile sometimes myself cuz i cant get chicks.. they see my as desperate and all.. but hell with it i say my advice here for u is listen to athorny robbinson he got tools to set up your motivation n where u want to go in life.. i wish u succeed in the future
