So, my boyfriends going to his friends stag nite and their going to a lap dance club. It's normal for me as his girlfriend to be uncomfortable about it. I can't stop thinking about him going... I really don't want him to go... I told him that i wasnt comfortable about him going but i didnt mind him going to have a drink, chatt and have a laugh. He said to me "It's only lap dancing, nothing will happen dont worry" It's not the fact that I don't mind him going, but i just dont like the fact some girl is going to be dancing on his lap. I am the type of girl who over thinks things too much. But once i told him this he started laughing at me. When telling a boyfriend this i expect him to say "awwwh babe dont worry, if you don't want me to get a lap dance i wont" But no, his reply was "what can i say man, its just a lap dance their obviously going to give me one." As a boyfriend he should understand my feelings. When i got reallly upset i just said "forget it, i cba anymore im not ur gf for the nite do wot ever you want." he replied "okay cool." Wot the hell man... Seriously I didnt expect that kind of reply. If he loves me enough he wont get one of a girl right? And won't pay for one either... This hasnt happened yet so i'm gonna wait to see wot happens. But I don't know wot to do... I just need advice... On wot everyone else thinks about this situation. Thanks.
i agree..... I went to a strip club before and I got to say it isn't that awesome... and I only went once for a buddies going away party night.... he is in Singapore now :(
Girl, you just got royally punked. Obviously, your feelings aren't as important as getting a hot sexy babe to grind her crotch into his for his physical pleasure. You do have a choice of fighting fire with fire. That is, go with a bunch of girlfriends to a woman's stag night, where hunky men musically gyrate their hips in your faces. In these show activities, once they close and lock the doors, the performers may reveal more of themselves for your, ahem... oral sampling pleasure. If your BF is as hip as he thinks he is, I'm sure that he will know this. So if he can get his lap dance, then you can go on a tasting expedition. If he agrees to the deal, then you know where you stand if your own BF doesn't give a shit that you're putting other men into your mouth. But, if he's horrified and aghast, then he may just realize how hurtful that he was to you. -noclue But honestly, he sounds like a sexually immature asshole, and IMHO, the kind that Dads usually warn their daughters about. Treat his existence like a bump in the road of life; forget it and drive on. -rolleyes
Oh shittt!! He did not give u that reply!?! ; If my bf said that to me he would be dead right now ¬_¬
^dammit knoc, you just slipped in a post before me xD @mui Wonder where is he now? Haven't seen him on PA for a while
I have been through this before. I can say that it really depends on the relationship's strength. At a certain point, there are sacrifices that are made to show a persons' TRUE LOVE towards another. If this is a trigger, this should tell you a lot more of him. If your relationship is brief and if your doubts surface even w/ the test of time, then I think he is nothing but a trash stock. My guess is, you two are just another typical couple in the puppy love stage, influenced by nothing more than the media. It's okay though. =) Guys these days have very terrible influence, they forget the fact that there are actual 'men' out there that don't even do such things. They think it is 'okay' to go to strip clubs and what not because it's a norm developed through their amateur reasonings. It's like saying Divorce is okay, because it happens so often. While on a lighter note, the whole lap dance thing is bad, if you must compromise, I think there is nothing you can really do. Time reveals who a person really is. If you feel he is hurting you and if you are sacrificing too much for him, then it's not really worth your time. Your pain will be more worst if you do not cut him off early! --- You need to give more information. When I was close w/ someone, I made clear of my feelings at any stage. If she valued it, I could tell. Of course I had to compromise, but the girl I was with valued me dearly and I did not in return do such things to hurt her. At that time, I treasured her. But she took a turn for something else, and ruined things. Although I don't blame her, it was a deep one. All in all, I can tell the guy is selfish, and one of those typical dudes that cannot control his sexual desires. It is not good in the long haul. If he cannot VALUE one of your MOST CRUCIAL/VITAL feelings, then he is not worth keeping! Bottom line! Don't be treated like trash! Most girls these days treat THEMSELVES like TRASH !
First off, I found this thread to be a very interesting read. Great topic you started here, YaingyWaffles!. It just so happens that I'm planning a bachelor party for my buddy later this week. And, of course, going to a strip club and getting the groom a dance was part of the plan. The idea is that it's going to our brother's last night as a single man, so we want to give him his last chance to have fun before he ties the knot. The thing is, when someone buys you a dance, and you refuse....it's going to make you look weak in front the other guys. If a guy refuses because his girlfriend won't let him, then the guy often gets joked about being "whipped". And us guys are really sensitive about stuff like that. About the reply you gave your boyfriend, "forget it, i cba anymore im not ur gf for the nite do wot ever you want.", this is the best answer that every guy dreams of hearing. So when you said it, it was music to his ears and so he either didn't see your sarcasm at all or he's found a reply from you he can take advantage of. I like the idea brought up by one of the comments above. I'm talking about the one about the girls having a bachelorette party of their own. In that case, all the guy's got is trust that you don't give away anything to other men. So I don't know, maybe the only thing you can really do is trust your boyfriend when he says the dance is meaningless. Anyway, in our case, the groom admitted that he is worried the bride-to-be will not be happy about him going to a strip club. So we don't plan on going to a strip club anymore. But I also know of some couples where the bride understands it's the groom's last chance to be stupid with the guys, that it is meaningless (it is more of a symbolic thing), and she is not bothered by it.
This is the EXACT mentality I hear. This is the utmost, most cliche, and hurtful reasoning EVER ! When a guy believes the BS about messing around before tying the knot, he in himself is placing full faith that divorce will not take place amongst other retarded thinking. Well guess what, divorce rates are what it is for what reason ?!!! Give me a break, when you use the 'fool' around before 'marrying' reason. That's the same reason why people divorce !!! People just don't respect the other, and they marry for the wrong reasons. They believe in this corrupted Westernized way of thinking that does not make any logical sense. Why must you reason yourself into having a bachelorette's/bachelor's party that fondles the idea of an extra-marital affair, and then later divorce due to an affair? Give society a break !!! I was a 'best' man before a few times, and most subjected to such thinking which I thought was childish. I still arranged a strip club because it was the 'style'. Yet, I have talked to enough respectable woman in society which REFRAIN from such sheeple thinking. Everyone knows what I mean, but they hate to admit it. Just my 2 cent.
i went once to a strip club, with my wife... lol it was slightly awkward i guess. otherwise when it was stag's night i never was allowed to go haha.
There are two outcomes to this: Him getting a lap dance and you be a great girlfriend and be cool with it. Him getting a lap dance and you be all upset over it. I mean, he told you the truth, would you rather him lying to you next time?
yea... think of it this way would u like it if your girlfriend was getting a lap dance from a guy... swinging his thing all over her haha how would you feel... not good...
