relationship vs partner

Discussion in 'Love and Relationships' started by smallrinilady, Mar 15, 2007.

?

If you could have only one, which would you pick

  1. A Perfect Relationship, with not the most perfect person

    7 vote(s)
    41.2%
  2. The Perfect Person, with not the most perfect relationship

    10 vote(s)
    58.8%
  1. smallrinilady

    smallrinilady Well-Known Member

    this is a FOR FUN QUESTION
    please don take it too seriously
    everyone already knows these senerios are never possible
    but just for a moment please pretend they are




    So I'm with my guy, but we aren't 'official' and i dont see that happening for a while

    lots of people told me to give up on him, for stability sake
    but i really like him, so i wont give up



    anyways so i was complaining to a friend today, and something interesting popped into my head

    lots of people tell me to let go of this guy, because we're not even in a 'real' relationship anyways and go find someone who is willing to call me his GF in front of the whole world

    but then i realized (when repeating what they said in my head)
    these girls are looking for the PERFECT RELATIONSHIP not the perfect person
    (cause the perfect person doesn't always mean the perfect relationship, and vis vera)
    they are looking for companionship, not a partner

    OK, so when talking about looking for a future partner, not casual dating
    do you get together with the person you think who would make the best life together even if you dont think you would have the most fun with?
    or do you get together with the person you always enjoy being with, but do not have the security that they will always be there for you










    oh shoot, now that brought up a whole new set of points in my head to make my idea of which is proper start turning
    how can you trust someone to stand by your side when you dont know if they will not be there forever
     
    #1 smallrinilady, Mar 15, 2007
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2007
  2. sounds like a plot for some sort of korean movie.. lol

    still thinking like a nerd from school, "perfect" is an impossible term.

    if you meant "right" instead, i would go for "right person, not right relationship".

    reason being? if you take a look at people on tv, after a teeny weeny argument, they divorce. they can never really settle down if they continuously split after a small "something's wrong".

    i saw an episode of everybody loves raymond, and you see ray's parents constantly in an up and down state. but they say that that is normal in a relationship.

    and its true. little bumps along the way is in fact healthy for your relationship.
     
  3. Ryan618

    Ryan618 Member

    7
    26
    0
    Relationships are never perfect, therefore I would go for the perfect person. I mean only through obstacles could you actually build a relationship with that perfect person. I have yet to go trhough the "perfect relationship" haha because so far in most people's dictionaries it just doesn't happen.

    As for your last comment, if you never trust the person you are with to stand by your side and are always doubting them. No one will ever be able to come close to even stand beside you, let alone be with you forever.
     
  4. jnetcube5

    jnetcube5 Well-Known Member

    413
    53
    0
    the thing i don't understand is how do you know if you are with the perfect person or not. if you haven't went out with all the people in the world you won't be able to know if he is the perfect person. the same goes for a perfect relationship.

    so to answer your question.. i don't think there is a perfect relationship or a perfect partner. instead you should choose for yourself what you really want.
     
  5. skid

    skid Well-Known Member

    394
    53
    0
    yeah i'm in a similar situation to you smallrinilady. I'm with a girl but we aren't gf/bf couple but i do like her. We've both talked about our relationship and yeah sometimes its good the way things are, but sometimes i do feel that we can become a little distant, think it's just that i'm not too sure what i want, and i'm sure it's the same for her.

    But to answer your question i don't think there ever will be a perfect relationship or a perfect person so to speak. The world is a huge place, there's always going to be potential for a better person or relationship in your life, it really depends on you, whether you are happy with the ways things are or want more. And nothing lasts forever, nowadays its really hard to find someone you could be with for the rest of your life, you'd have to be really lucky i guess

    Anyways you and your guy seems to be stable from what i hear. Do you feel that you need to move into a more "serious" relationship with him? you're not official because he's not ready? well anyways just give it some time, you guys have been through a lot of problems in the past and still end up strong together. To follow your friends advice and give up on it will just mean all your effort will go to waste.
     
  6. PhY pHy

    PhY pHy Well-Known Member

    Well i think no one is perfect..but if u cope
    wif the persons weakness then u will learn
    more from it...i mean...a perfect person might
    not be the one ur i love wif rite?sometimes
    u like that person or is attracted to that person
    bc of their weakness...but does he love u?
    did he ever admit he loves u..or even like?
     
  7. smallrinilady

    smallrinilady Well-Known Member


    that didn't answer my question
    this is a hypothetical what if question
    and seconldy, you shuo choose for yourself?
    huh?
    i'm asking you waht you would do

    i'm not asking for advice
    this is more for like statistics kind of poll


    just curious to know what kind of people there are out there
     
  8. casshern

    casshern Well-Known Member

    820
    68
    0
    You can build a perfect relationship if you are with the perfect person, but you cannot build a perfect person through a perfect relationship.
     
  9. damn.. I didn't even get what the hell you were talkin' about.. but aren't you being a hypocrite?? weren't you lookin for that perfect relationship.. something that'll lead to marriage or some shit??

    now you jus got the guy n you're happy.. but dude's not even claiming his your bf...



    I cock pistols back n clap missiles back its that simple...
     
  10. Homeless

    Homeless Member

    21
    26
    0
    first one
     
  11. reno

    reno Well-Known Member

    well basically its kind of saying
    pick between
    a) u like the guy/girl more than they like u; or
    b) they like u more htan u like them

    which type of relationship would u prefer?

    at the end of the day, referring back to ur qn, how the relationship stands/works out depends how hard u2 want to keep it
    of course the one who likes the other person more, would want to keep the relatinoship better

    and wat i think is that there is no "perfect", the "perfect" partner is more of an indication of how much u like them
     
  12. smallrinilady

    smallrinilady Well-Known Member

    Oh I love that


    this was suppose to be a fFOR FUN question
    NOT SERIOUS
    so stop taking it so seriously
     
  13. smallrinilady

    smallrinilady Well-Known Member


    as for this
    i'm a hypocrite because i'm dating a guy i like?
    because i get to hang out and act like a couple with him?
    even though right now he still wont outright say he wants to be in a full committment to me?

    the reason this came up was because somepeople tell me i should dump him, because he wont use those word gf/bf, and it sounds like your one of those people
    but i really like him enough i'm willing to countinue dating him (WITHOUT titles) until later on he may be comfortable to put labels down on the table
    so what if i have to wait, so what if it's not at the pace i wish it was
    we've gone through a lot of complicated hardship together, but we managed to stil be 'together' through all this

    i know that everyone thinks i'm going to be heart broken by the end of all this
    but i'm still willing to take that risk
    why?
    cause i just really care for the guy just that much

    this is why i would pick the perfect person and not the perfect relationship
     
    #13 smallrinilady, Mar 16, 2007
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2007
  14. hiake

    hiake Vardøgr of da E.Twin

    It's kind of strange: how can a person be perfect while the relationship is not perfect? When it's a matter of relationship, I guess I would want to perfect relationship (since I don't think an imperfect relationship can occur with the perfect person, it's just an oxymoron)

    While hoping to find Mr. Right, in all likelihood, he would be made (into) Mr. Right by the right relationship.
     
  15. TreSamurai82

    TreSamurai82 Active Member

    44
    31
    0
    i have to say, that i believe that you should be with that person that you always enjoy being with, life is going to throw you all kinds of curve balls and things like that, why not be there with the one you feel completes you, he or she might not be perfect but at the very least they are there with you, right? its got to be on how you look at it in the end, that person might perfect in your eyes, because you see their ups and downs, you see who they are and you know that they see who you are and the both of you are cool with that, two hearts, two minds, one spirit ;)
     
  16. dragong87

    dragong87 Well-Known Member

    853
    68
    0
    i'd go partner.. be wit some1 u like. then see how it goes and it might turn in2 arelationship :p
     
  17. WilliamStorm

    WilliamStorm Well-Known Member

    153
    41
    0
    I'd say perfect person and pray that the relationship will get better^^, a perfect relationship with the no so ideal person is also not much use =(*
     
  18. gameofiso

    gameofiso Active Member

    28
    26
    0
    Don't listen to your friends. they are jealous of you.
     
  19. casshern

    casshern Well-Known Member

    820
    68
    0
    The perfect person does not guarantee the perfect relationship or vice versa. But the likelyhood of building a perfect relationship with the perfect person is higher than if it were to be the other way around. You can't force yourself to like someone.