Basically, today one of my friends asked me whether he could borrow a music cd and after a while I decided to let him borrow it. The question is should I have let him borrow it cos tbh i don't see him as a true friend. The reason being is everytime I get stuck with work and ask him for help, he always says no. Also, even though I haven't asked whether I could borrow something off him, I get the feeling that he wouldn't let me borrow something even if I did ask him. On the other hand when I originally said no to him when he asked he kept buggering me and asked if I was his friend and as a friend I should let him borrow it. I did let him borrow cos I'm a nice person but should I have done this? If not what should I have said cos I don't rele want to make enemies now.
no u shouldnt have lent it to him. especially if u have doubts. anways u should hope he returns it in one piece. friends are supposed to help each other and stuff
well i hope it wasn't a really important cd... and if he returns it to you in some crap condition then speak up, demand not ask DEMAND compensation for it and never again let him borrow stuff from you.... but if its the latter than ask to borrow something from him and see how he reacts =\
I also lend things to other persons that i dont really know, and I am always getting it back. Sometimes i need to ask it back first..... but I *always* get my stuff back It happen to me 1 time, I lended some stuff too my friend, but when i asked him if he could return it to be he said:'' ow, I lended it to my friend'' Which i basically dont know who he is... It's my stuff, and if I let you borrow it doesn't mean you can borrow my stuff to others..... :rl: IIf he was your friend, he will always want to help you if you asked them. even when they say No they always have an explanation. But after reading your thoughts about this, you dont like him, and dont see him as a friend. So basically you answered the question yourself, you wouldn't lend something to someone you hate/stranger :stickpoke:
well i don't hate him but i just don't like his selfish attitude cos he doesn't help anyone. he's one of those ppl who are like oh no i don't want to help u incase u getter better grades than me. but ye hopefully i will get my cd back in one piece.
probably not, i mean, why let him borrow your stuff when he barely qualifies as a friend ? just cross your fingers that the cd won't come back with scotch tape all over it.
ye, it was just when i sed no the first time he made it seem awkard like i'm ur friend and its only gonna be for a few days, so i didn't rele know how to reply.
Sure let him borrow it this time, cos your a nice person and let him see u are, but after this, if he still refuses to help u wen needed or doesnt let u borrow anything wen asked of him, dnt lend him stuff again, and if he uses the 'friend' excuse, just tel him he has never treated u as a friend - point out the times if necessary, and hopefully, it get him to start thinking about his actions.
You have a problem with your self esteem. You already know he isn't your friend; yet you're afraid to say so and act on it. Learn to be assertive, its in your best interest. Ralph
ye thats wat i was thinking. but yea not that bothered about it now. just wait to get it back on tues. ye im working on being more assertive.
Well, yes and no. Its just a CD in that most people won't worry about the cost of so simple an item. If that were the case, then why write about it here? THAT's the crux of the issue. BBES obviously felt "bothered" enough, for whatever the reasons, to write about it here. So it really isn't a cost of a CD issue, but rather how BBES is "used" by this other person and how annoyed about it BBES feels. Hence, my comment of "if you don't like something, you have to say so..." or else every clown in your life is going to take you to the emotional cleaners. Notice the word "emotional," again meaning not the simple cost from your wallet, but rather the more important psychic wear and tear of your person. Ralph
Do you need some help? I know this European guy.. he drives a taxi.. really good with handling these types of situation.. Maybe I can send him over and have him set your lil friend there straight...
