^ Did you even read my post aznmask? Let me put it in simpler english... YOU have EVERY right to FEEL uncomfortable (feel betrayed, upset, (insert synonym of previous words) because of your friend's ACTION. Which was to go and have a night out with a fellow co-worker which the location was a NIGHT CLUB. YOU (AZNMASK) have invited him to a NIGHT CLUB & STRIP CLUB as a social outing / event to bring him out to give him a chance to SOCIALIZE with the general public but every single time he has refused but suddenly a fellow CO-WORKER asks him to go to the night club he for some absurd reason accepts. Now why has he done this? Maybe you have to REFLECT on how you invite him as just from reading your replies this is how I get it. Nightclub: You invite him because you feel he should be LESS Anti-Social and should go out and meet new friends with you and you have asked him a lot of times to go with you but each time he has rejected you cause he "DOESN'T LIKE CLUBBING" Strip Club: You invite him because you feel he needs VAGINA because he is a 27 year old VIRGIN and you have asked him before but he also reject. Now let's start with the night club. You say you don't like PUSHING people but yet you have asked him COUNTLESS of times but he has rejected you before. If he doesn't want to go with you but you keep asking him even though the outcome is the same each time I would feel that's a bit PUSHY. If he wants to go with you he will ask you to go with him. (SAME with the strip club). Now why would he go with his co-worker and not you? This you might need to have a think yourself. I obviously don't know your friend and how you ask your friend BUT from how you describe your friend seems to me that you might make your friend uncomfortable and your whole "objective" of going to the night club / strip club. Maybe he DOES NOT want to meet new people at a night club or look at some strangers vagina with STDs who knows? He might of gone with the co-worker simply because it was just a casual SOCIAL MEETING with the fellow co-worker with NO PRESSURE to meet new people .ect. THIS MIGHT BE WHY. Kapishe? Comprehendo? 明白吗？ He most likely feels uncomfortable every time you ask him and feels nervous or what not so maybe you can think about that and have a nice talk with him and ask him why to find out his feelings. (KEYWORD MOST LIKELY). OFF TOPIC: Is it wrong to ask a friend to go Strip Club No it isn't wrong to ask a friend to a strip club but your motives to go to the strip club (for him or for yourself) might clash with his morals. He might feel uncomfortable to go to those sort of places so no it isn't wrong to ask once but any more then that (after rejection) maybe find out why first before you keep pestering him and reminding him that he is a 27 old virgin. For example would you be proud to tell your mum you just had sex with a prostitute or would you mind your relatives see you walking out of a Triple X Store. I for one would say no.
Give it some time for him to absorb and understand, so far you've given him way too much words to comprehend
lol, people always invite me to club but i refuse and after a few times they just dont bother. then went to a club out of the blue and they ask howd i like it rather than i didnt go with them... anywayz, its true forums arent the greatest of places to ask for help. we spend more time trolling because thats for the entertainment
I was kind of tired and misread your response about if my friend is guy or girls. You actually mean the co-worker. my apologize. Okay whatever you dont have to reply in wall of texts. Anyway this rant thing is out of my control. I hope this thread will be end it right here.
The dynamics discussed in this whole thread sort of reminds me of an old classic called Marty (the thread sounds like the relationship between the two guys, Angie (short for Angelo) and Marty). The bottom line is, people are going to be slaves to their own wants and needs, but every once in a while we break out of our routines and find something new.
lmao. this thread is hilarious. Too bad the first post was re-edited, wanted to read it. Never knew a guy would get this mad or lets say jealous over something so stupid, unless your Homosexual? cause reading your replies really put it that way. Big ass world out there, meet lots of people and be friends with them and get over this issue.
I don't think that he's gay or homo leaning, but like I'd alluded to with my 'Marty' comment, he sort of reminds me of the character Angie (Angelo) from that movie. For those that have never seen this academy award winning classic, Marty is about a middle aged butcher who is always hanging out with his best friend, Angie. They're two lonely guys who have no one but each other to socialize with. But as one of them (Marty), discovers that there may be more to life, Angie becomes jealous and tries to make Marty ignore his new found friendship and love. This has nothing to do with homosexuality, blatant or latent. Rather, it's about the loss of attention and our feelings of rejection, inadequacies or loss of self esteem that occurs when someone close to us decides to turn their attention elsewhere. The second video below is the spoiler ending that sums up the sentiments in a nutshell. [video=youtube;xIah4s6ePQo]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIah4s6ePQo[/video] [video=youtube;k4lpdP7uKeA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4lpdP7uKeA[/video]
I read it when it was first posted but didn't get a chance to respond. Anyway, it's kinda like how my college roommate/friend didn't invite me to his wedding when I invited him to mine. I got over it. But I think you should really re-evaluate your relationship with this so-called friend guy. Your reaction is leaning towards jealousy more than betrayal. Sure you're not gay? Tight friends especially young people would settle it right there .. not doing it here. Confront him? I did so with my guy friends back then .. WTF .. why you did this/that and move on? If you don't get this off your chest, then it just doesn't feel right hanging around with the friend anymore. Close friend should be people you can talk to easily and be yourself. Anyway, talk it out with him and move on.
So someone doesn't go to an event with you. You re-evaluate your relationship with them? Talk about being an uptight friend. Honestly, if I may make a constructive criticism, please be more care free, even in your situation with the friend who was married. Good friends should be understanding of the other. Bad friends care more about themselves than the friend him/herself. Choose wisely.
When I said, re-evaluate his relationship because he sounded more like a jealous bitch. Is it just friendship or more?? Got it? I have no clue where your gd friend .. blah blah .. come from ..
well i did talked to him about the issue. After he told me he clubbed with his co-worker. He is not my hangout friend. (we usually talk on the phone, sometime we dont see each other in 1yr). Anyway he dont like to hangout. I do have other friends that i hang out with. I just dont feel good when i invited him to club to hangout, even my birthday party. He just went there for dinner then he left. (while me and my other friends go clubbing). I know he not like clubbing, i just want him to experience it.. Okay guys i'm glad he experienced clubbing with his co-worker so plz stop hating me..
I was under the impression that your suggestion to "re-evaluate" the friendship was based on the claim that the friend was a bad friend to have gone with the co-worker and not OP. And as such, I gathered that you suggested to OP to "re-evaluate" the friendship due to the friend going out with the co-worker and not OP. And based on that, I followed with my bolded statement, that OP "re-evaluating" the friendship meant that he cared more about himself than the friend. The reason I came to that statement was also in part due to your own situation with your married friend. That's where the "blah blah" came from.
No one hates you here .. no reason for that. You're a member since 2007, should know that by now. Did you invite him out of courtesy or what? What about other friends?? Do you do the same or just him??? If you say, just him then it's something else between you two. If you say; all other friends too, then you shouldn't be feeling this bad about the incident, right?? Seriously dude, reflect a bit ...
With my friend's situation ...it's not about understanding him .. it's about brotherhood dude .. your Chinese call "yi hey". Understanding means communication .. my friend is not doing that. Do I just accept the fact that he didn't invite despite our friendship and understand the situation?? No. That would apply if our friendship wasn't close enough to deserve an invitation.
he dont have much close friends.. I think i'm only best friend he have. (maybe) lol Last yr it was my birthday, and he went to dinner with me & my friends. But he didnt go to club with us. What does it tell you? 1. he dont like club, 2. he dont know about 'give respect to your friends especially on their birthday' ( i asked him to go but he said no. Then i wont ask again.
Is this asking a one time thing or over and over again? Whether you're his only good friend or not, your reaction is still a bit over the top. Giving respect is by attending your party; not hitting the club.
lol you just answered your own issue with my problem. Hey how does it feel when your friend didnt invite you? lol how does i feel when i invite my friends to club, and he didnt go with me instead with his co-worker. since i treat him like a "Yi hey" brother.
