^lol diaster diverted smallrinilady: if your personally that pissed at your friends, then they arent your friends, go hang with people that your more comfy with
it took me a while to learn my chinese so just watch more tv and speak it a bit more try to pronounce how others pronounce thats how i did it
just because they piss me off regarding my chinese, doesn't mean i still dont love them for everything else they do
I confronted some of them, on a one to one basis i couldnt believe what my bestfriend said she kept giving me excuses 1) "your chinese IS bad", but because we have been your friend for so long we know what you are trying to say and we dont want to embarrase you by continusely correcting your chinese (because it might make me feel bad) so instead they joke about it . . . . WTF 2)(when i said could you at least encourage me once in a while)no, because HK people rarely NEVER encourage people, she kept repeating this a lot throughout the conversation, i wanted to tell her to shut up, i said "I dont care, but as a friend, can you stop making fun of me" she kept telling me that i didn't know their culture (which basically goes back to me not being a real chinese person once again) and how i'm always saying things wrong (and you just leave me to believe i'm right therefore further engraining it into my head?)
I don't think case 2 make sense at all. Because it just depends on what kind of person you are. There are parents and friends who do encourage me plenty and not be condescending about it. I hope you will resolve this with your friends. Because I think it is quite annoying too, if people start questioning my English (not mother tongue) >.<
there are only so many hours in a day especially when you have to sleep, work, cook, clean, and time to hang out of friends beyond a tv but yea i try,
This is funny, whenever I read your posts rini, I had thought that you were the exact opposite: a Chinese-native fluent in Chinese and bad at English. Anyway, smallrini: you can always try to take their comments of "oh, don't use that word with her, she doesn't know it" -- and reverse it; there's so many ways to distort the comment back at them to make 'em feel bad for assuming. Heck, you're in America -- there should be ample incidents where you guys will run into a situation where they, the FOBs, will have to showcase their POOR VERBAL ENGLISH skills, right? Don't be afraid to make fun of them. Give them a taste of how it feels. Be like "What the fuck are you trying to say? Your English made us look bad, bitch." And one last thing. Don't try too hard in improving your Chinese with them "TVBs".. your English might just worsen like the handful of ABC's here who speak English with a "fobby" accent, which gets me everytime -- "WTF, you're ABC? You sound like a fucking FOB, dude."
HA HA HA I wouldn't do that because I dont think i should be doing what makes me unhappy as revenge against other people
^ Smallrinilady is well mannered Although I think "one must be able to take what one dishes out"... I do not think that laughing your friends on something else would help the situation, it would be risking ruining the friendship. A bit of talking may help... MAY... Best luck smallrinilady -flow
I don't mean it as a serious response .. like fuck around with them. I mean.. they're your friends, there's no need to take shit from them like that everytime -- if they're going to throw those at you, fiddle around with it and throw it right back, playfully of course (like as a joke or something sarcastic). For your example, if one of your friends said "don't use that word with her, she doesn't know it.." -- say something along the lines of "who said I didn't know it? what are you trying to say?" in a friendly manner. It might be sort've difficult to understand the example because it's supposed to be in Cantonese, but declined and translated into English. When I said to make fun of your friends when they speak English, I don't mean it serious terms. For example, if they fuck up their English conversation in one scenario, say something that'll bounce their previous insult right back: "if you don't know how to respond in English, don't say it la.. let me do the talking" very similarly to the tone he/she used when they made fun of you. I don't know how your friends will react, but for me, we never get into serious arguments or fights because of a couple sarcastic or smartass remark like that. We get laughs among other things. @babyrain & rini about my initial comment: hahaha, it was NOT meant to be mean, disrespectful or anything of that nature. I genuinely found it ironic because I seriously thought that she was a Chinese native, probably due to her frequent grammar/typo errors, whether they be intentional, rushed or not. Forgive me if I offended you, rini. -innocent2
rsx it's OK.. but i just found it rather offending when i read it... haha maybe it's just me I am quite touchy :X
well the idea of what RSX said was sad, but I mean if i'm that bad, i have to be able to be able to laugh at myself it's just different if someone points it out as a flaw then laughs and does it over and over and over . . . anyways, i understand the idea of making them understand how i feel by throwing back at them what they do to me but it still isn't my style i'm scared i will end up doing that only when extrememly mad, and it end up sounding all wrong besides one of them doesn't like being made fun of for his english he told me one day, and during that conversation i also told him that i'm too scared to talk with the crowd around for the same reason we both hadn't realized we had been making each other feel unconfortable, so from then on he stopped making fun of me (well he had pointed out my unknowledge of chinese once or twice since, but i know he didn't even realize it) and he asked me to help correct his english without putting him down I did end up talking to my closest friend about it although we got into a huge argument about a lot of different things as a result the next day i left her a voice message apologizing for the arguing (not what it was about, but how we ended up disscussing it) so we are really good now and the other guy, well after crying on him, i think he got the point,
your are not alone, my chinese is horrible as well....i had to take lessons at a 3rd or 4th grade level when i was there a few summers ago...and my 10 year old cusin helped me the homework that i got from my privat teacher.....and i totally made a fool out of myself when our school had visitors from China...
What do you mean my idea was "sad"? If it isn't your style to take the insult and turn it into a joke or sarcasm, then I don't really see any way in helping the situation get better unless you talk to them about it. Though, I find it supremely awkward to be criticizing your friends on the way they talk and "joke" about things. I mean, after telling them how annoying they are for making fun of you, I would feel awkward hanging out with them again. I don't know, it's just me -- you're a female, it probably will be different. In my opinion, if they're your true friends, they shouldn't be doing that shit, it's sad really. And yeah, that's my point in regards to your friend who doesn't like being made fun of. You gotta get your other "pals" to realize it and thus, stop the nonsense. Some friends you got there.. rini.
Yeah, people who are better than me at Chinese always say stuff like that to me. Especially people in China/HK. BUT DUH, I was born here, I don't know as much Chinese as you! BLAH.
^^^hah another bump?? i'm pretty much the same way la.. i came here a while ago, and almost never speak chinese to other ppl coz i don't have time to go out.. and then i forgot how to read too!!=( i just think as long as i can understand ppl and reply, i am ok.. just as long as i can get my work done
