what just reallyed annoyed me from the converstaions is that people are telling me that I'm the one doing someting wrong and my friends have the right to be mad at me because i decided to keep a part of my life private
i know what u mean... some of my friends i dont speak regularly would feel insulted if i wouldnt ring em and tell em ive got a bf... i do understand in a way but hey its really up to me if i do it or not.. its not like im hiding anything from them or that i wanna keep it down low...but like i said b4 they will find out someday anyway
i'd definitely tell the people close to me and i don't tell other people. they either know or they don't
i don't tell anyone, they can figure it out if they got any common sense. "hey those 2 are always together. hey they're holding hands... are they dating?"
From the past, there have been a few relationships of mine that end very quickly. So, I usually wait until it's stable, though I probably won't bring it up unless someone asks.
In general this is a problem with people's attitude. People are negative with their comments and they challenge your judgment with a partner as inferior. These are the two main reasons as to why people delay in their expressing their relationship to others. Afterall, they rather not have the hassle until they are sure of their relationship, only then, do they have the courage to withstand the onslaught of negative comments and cruel remarks from their friends and relatives. As to cultural differences, whites tends to relatively value love more as "love" is an abstract intangible quality that one will find hard to benchmark and be critical of. Whereas asians tend to value material objects and physical appearance over love therefore it is far easier to be critical of these tangible items. Tangible items could be the size of the wallet, value of car, branded goods, straight or not so straght teeth, shape of nose, height, age, job status, qualifications ..etc. With love there is no measurement for it and no reference benchmark! This is so pure and simple. Please forgive me if I am so candid about the cultural difference. All you have to do is to browse through the threads in these forums(fora) and you will know what I mean! It is only when you are sure to love someone will you be able to defend your bf or gf qualities against those critical remarks from others about your bf or gf's tangible qualities. E.g. oh, he drives a cheap old car, he hasn't got a decent job, she is too far, her teeth is crooked...etc. As beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
